Blood Roses

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.

‭‭Philippians‬ ‭4‬:‭8‬

The great obsession of abnormal drinkers and addicts is that we will one day be able to control and enjoy it again.

We mull over our predicament nonstop.

We obsess over the reality of our demise while scanning the horizon for some other way.

We are distracted by the search for an alternative reality that has passed us by long ago.

Our problem, we’ve been told, is in between our ears.

Our thinking sucks.

We wouldn’t know praiseworthy if it hit us in the head.

We are looking for ease and comfort. We are looking for satisfaction.

We want to change how we feel.

This doesn’t go away overnight. It doesn’t go away on its own.

If we are to be free of the self-centered hurricane of thoughts that have kept us glued to our addictive patterns, we must change from the interior of our consciousness.

Fancy words. How do we do it?

We change our behavior by establishing new habits, new daily routines, new friend groups.

We change our thinking by establishing new reactions, new prayers, new influences.

Everything revolves around the cadence of our newly sober lives.

And this doesn’t change down the road, either.

I am the culmination of the habits that persist in my life.

If I am saved, it’ll be evident.

God, give me the wherewithal to obsess about good things.

Cheers, Eamonn
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